just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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