You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Randomize
