It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize