If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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