He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
