i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
a search helicopter?!
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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