I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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