she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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