I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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