They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
