I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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