I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
