a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
