What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
