The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
