But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
