ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize