So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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