It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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