So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
