Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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