He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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