how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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