One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize