watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
