I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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