Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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