Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize