Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
