you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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