now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize