I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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