is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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