I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
