Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
We had sex on a dog bed..
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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