You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
