im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize