3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
50% drunk capacity currently
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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