If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
