The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize