That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
