I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
