Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
