i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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