No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
