How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
