have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
