I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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