Well apparently he's into motor boating.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
