After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
