There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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