I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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