# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
